I left the house last night.

The apartment had been a little too quiet with Jeremy off in NM. So I went out with Cameron last night. I had a very good time, met some new people, and the evening ended with an El Camino buffalo burger(Note to self: difference between mild and medium is big.) I got drunk and rambled about how you'd think we were at war with Mexico the way we've got the border covered. I also mentioned that I thought we should get rid of 'la migra', and just let everyone into the country. That was when I realized that this is not the best thing to talk about while drunk in a bar in Texas. Actually, I should clarify that statement: When someone asks you why you think the borders should be opened up, you should not answer "Because I'm not a fascist, rednecked retard" while drunk in a bar in Texas. Its just not polite conversation.

Later I said something to the effect of drinking beer is like carb loading for rigorous masturbation last night. I thought it was funny. No one got it. I've heard of an open mike thing at the comedy club downtown and have wanted to go. But all of my jokes lose their appeal in elucidation.

"What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby?"

You have to take your boots off before you jump on a trampoline.